When we talk about referrals, we’re talking about applied psychology.  It’s science in action!  And, the more effectively you apply it, the more rewarding your strategy will be.  Unfortnately, most sales people have not such strategy in place.  Duh.  If that’s you, let’s see what we can do to help you.  Think of getting referrals as simple psychology married to common sense and logic.

To turn your activities into a systematic strategy, just equip your current clients with the right language to use when they talk about you to their friends and colleagues. No politician goes into public without being well versed in his/her “talking points.”  All you’re doing here is giving the talking points to someone else.

The language you give them will include two connections: values and relevance. After all, you might share values but not be trained to help them. Or, you might be an expert in what they need, but possess vastly different values.

Ultimately, you want to give your clients a reason to talk about you with other people, and in order for that to be effective, they need to know what to say and how to say it.

Doesn’t that make sense?  Pam and I are writing a book on the psychology of referrals.  If you want to learn how to get more referrals, just send us an email:  michael@aboutpeople.com

We (co-author Michael Lovas and I) have written quite a lot about first impressions. In particular the series of subconscious assessments that go on when we first meet someone. We know that the first thing that goes on is the “am I in danger?” assessment.

Every time a stranger looks at you, he or she makes a split-second determination as to whether you are friend or foe. Also among those split second assessments is an analysis of your attractiveness, likeability and credibility.

According to Princeton researcher and professor Alex Todorov, we are “hard wired” to quickly draw these inferences.

“The link between facial features and character may be tenuous at best, but that doesn’t stop our minds from sizing other people up at a glance. We decide very quickly whether a person possesses many of the traits we feel are important, such as likeability and competence, even though we have not exchanged a single word with them. It appears that we are hard-wired to draw these inferences in a fast, unreflective way.”

For more on first impressions, and in particular what people are “reading” to make these assessments, check out our book Axis of Influence – How Credibility and Likeability Intersect to Drive Success.

For more on Alex Todorov, check out All Things Considered, June 9, 2005 – Scientists Search for Winning Look. Forget political polls. Scientists usually can tell whether political candidates will win or lose by testing voters’ reactions to the contestants’ faces. A study in the journal Science shows that voters chose the face that looks more “competent.”

Professor Todorov’s Princeton Website

A few months ago, Pam and I were interviewed on two radio shows:

http://www.ducttapemarketing.com/podcast.php?id=P1329

http://www.contacttalkradio.com/hosts/archives/eldontaylor.html 

During the Duct Tape interview, John Jantsch asked a question about using psychology in marketing.  We explained that the easiest way is to segment your target market by professions.  See, each profession attracts people who tend to have the same personality type.

For example, surgeons are cut from the same bolt of cloth.  They are people who want to be (need to be) the king of the mountain.  They want to tell other people what to do.   The must be able to make snap decisions and be right.  They have the Driver personality type.

Now, knowing that, all you’d have to do is appeal to that personality type to reach them more effectively.  If you approached them in any other way, they would filter out your message.

There are three or four different types of doctors.  Half a dozen different types of business people.  Several different types of financial people.  Each one is represented by a personality type, or a combination of personality types.  If you don’t have a solid understanding of personality types, you will completely miss out on this strategic psychological advantage.  So, isn’t it time to improve your knowledge?

Go to our website’s Store page.  That’s where you can find a description of our book Face Values.  It is the best book on the planet to learn about using types in your marketing and selling. 

Most authors never get a review this good. For us, it’s even better because the reviewer is also a well-known author!

Well-researched. Highly readable. Very practical – Much has been written about credibility–but not more comprehensibly than Lovas and Holloway in this book.

They have built upon the work of researchers such as Kouzes and Posner in their link between leadership and credibility and added one KEY factor to the equation: likeability. The authors’ central message: Many credible people never find a ready audience for their work, and many likeable people never become credible. But marry the two characteristics–credibility and likeability–and you have a winning combination.

Further, the authors take the ingredients of likeability and credibility and make them tangible–and marketable. In short, their book tells sales professionals, managers, and consultants how their language, appearance, personality, hallway reactions, and marketing materials all reflect these two characteristics. — Dianna Booher, Author of Voice of Authority

Credibility is elusive. Few people understand it. Very few people can even describe it.

You may know that we’ve been working with Credibility since 1991. We know it inside and out. Here is our working definition:

Credibility is a combination of qualities:

Competence + Character + Consistency. Together, they create a belief in the minds of your target market that you understand their situation, have their best interest at heart, and are an expert at solving their specific problems.

That’s at the high level, the conceptual level. Notice how there is nothing there that you can implement or start using today? In practical terms, the first step to improve your Credibility is to improve your Likeability, and the first step in that is to learn how to read people. Where can you go to learn that? Easy, look at our book Face Values. It is the most effective resource for business professionals wanting to improve likeability. I say that because the first way you make yourself likeable to anyone is to match that person’f face!

If you find this tid bit of wisdom interesting, you’ll find our book astounding! You can find it on the Shop page at: http://www.aboutpeople.com/

– Michael Lovas

Alex Todorov said:

“The link between facial features and character may be tenuous at best, but that doesn’t stop our minds from sizing other people up at a glance. We decide very quickly whether a person possesses many of the traits we feel are important, such as likeability and competence, even though we have not exchanged a single word with them. It appears that we are hard-wired to draw these inferences in a fast, unreflective way.”

All Things Considered, June 9, 2005 Forget political polls. Scientists usually can tell whether political candidates will win or lose by testing voters’ reactions to the contestants’ faces. A study in the journal Science shows that voters chose the face that looks more “competent.” http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=4696649

Professor Todorov’s Princeton Website
http://weblamp.princeton.edu/~psych/psychology/research/todorov/index.php

More than once I’ve heard people use their personality type as an excuse for bad behavior. “I’m a Driver, that’s what we do” or “I can’t help it, I’m a thinker, not a doer.”

To this I say WRONG! I don’t believe in excuses at all, particularly those that justify the continuance of bad behavior. This is especially bad when it comes from people who have been trained in our Face Values program or other “read and connect” type programs that help people flex and connect with those who are different.

The overall objective is to be able to flex into those colors or personality types that are not primary for you. This is the mark of the truly successful. Some people have it easier than others because they are more of a natural blend of types. It’s easy for me to flex from Analytical to Expressive, because I have a lot of Expressive in my blend. Not so easy to go into Amiable, but that doesn’t stop me from getting there. I’ve developed a couple of “state change” routines that put me into the mindset of a different personality type. If I want to go into Amiable, for example, I change my voice to the voice I use to talk to my pets. This vocal change resets my brain and I am able to communicate in Amiable mode.

We were working on a piece on charisma the other day and it dawned on me that charisma is really just the ability to fluidly move in and out of different styles so that you connect with everyone. Think about people you know who you consider charismatic. Are they strongly one color – all Driver, all Thinker, all Expressive? Not likely.

Barack Obama is a great example of charisma and of someone who naturally flexes. Next chance you get, watch him. If you’re familiar with face values, watch how his face changes and moves through the different “states.” Listen to the sound of his voice, his tone and pace. He is soft spoken, yet powerful.

The best video example is when he was on the Oprah show. If you get a chance to watch that, I’d highly recommend it. I couldn’t find a copy of that on the web, but here’s another good choice – Barack on the Charlie Rose Show.

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=5456752353400414374?

P.S. This is not a political endorsement, it is merely an example of a blended, flexible demeanor.